Is this funny? I don’t think it’s funny.

A long time ago, in a land far away, a girl composed a poem about worms.  i can’t really remember much of it, except that it was hilarious.  SO, for my WriMo, I set out to create a similar funny (if not hilarious) poem, to be added into my tale.  Of course, feeling not so inspired for most of the time I was writing, I left the poem for the end, for the last of my creative juices.  The result is less than pleasing:

Digging, delving, ever pinker

Rolling juicy earthworms pant.

Singing gaily of their prowess

Who can tell what makes them dance?

Dancing come they, willy-nilly.

Dancing come they, to a feasting.

Festive garbage, festive eating.

How to move, then, with no feet?


Jiggle-juggle go the earthworms

Jiggle juggle dancing sweetly

Keeping time with rings of gristle

Keeping jiggles as they creep.

In there tunnels none will mark them.

Eating refuse, breathing deep.

So, now I need to make this funny.  Or, if you already think it’s funny (you weirdo, you).  I need to make it funn-ier.  Please help.

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3 Comments

  1. Alex said,

    November 26, 2008 at 2:15 pm

    I think you should leave the poem as-is, but have the character who reads/writes it be immediately struck by lightning. Bwah haha.

  2. sedgehammer said,

    November 26, 2008 at 2:18 pm

    Gee thanks, Alex. That would work really well as the reader is the MAIN CHARACTER AT THE BEGINNING OF THE STORY. And no, she can’t be dead for the rest of the novel.

  3. shannon said,

    November 26, 2008 at 2:55 pm

    ummm, I think it’s great. And I realize I am thus proclaiming myself a weirdo. Oh well!


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