Got 2 B Elmered

Recently, I was a superhero.  I know that some of you are familiar with my life experience in the superhero world as Anti-Danger, but it is not my only superhero persona.  For Corina’s birthday extended celebration, I took on a new one – White Lightning.

With both the powers of backwoods Bacchus and electric charge on my side, I was ready to have a riotous good time.  Only one thing was in my way – how best to make my hair stand up as if I’d dropped a toaster in the bathwater?  Gel or hairspray weren’t going to cut it for the spiked-out ‘do I wanted to achieve.  I turned to a product called got 2 B glued, which promised ‘ultimate screaming hold’ on its package.  I could use ultimate screaming hold.  Since I’m going for something higher than bride of Frankenstein, hair that screams seemed to be exactly what I needed.

However, I failed to take into account the ‘glue’ nature of the product.  I assumed styling glue to be some new type of product I had failed to notice before.  Heck, I barely even know you want ceramic plates in your straightening iron.  How am I going to know all the names for different types of product?  So i ended up sculpting myself with something of a consistency between Elmer’s and Tacky Glue.  My hands were so stickily slimed that I had to have Gina blowdry for me.  It was great!

Of course, I came out with rock-hard hair that took over an hour to wash out of my short hair, but that’s what comes of pouring glue all over your head and then blow drying it.  And what i really got for $5 was a multi-use product.  Even if i never sculpt my hair with it again, I can count on its super-strong hold for model building or paper mache.

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